A Note to Marie Osmond
Dear Marie,
I am so sorry to hear of the passing of your beautiful son, Michael. I can see what a dedicated and supportive woman you are, and what a wonderful mother. It’s such a shock and so painful.
I am writing because I have walked in your shoes. My beautiful son, Adam, took his own life on Jan. 11, 2008. He also left a note. He also was beautiful and well loved.
I am not writing to explain anything, because it is truly the unthinkable. But I am writing to say that I have found some comfort as time has gone on. I thought it would kill me. But it hasn’t. I have learned to listen for Adam’s voice. I refuse to say goodbye to him. I do believe that the spirit survives death, and although there are huge mysteries … all religions point to the survival of the spirit. I miss my Adam’s skin, but I still have his heart.
I hope you will find some comfort as you travel this very difficult road. I want you to know, that if you ever want to talk, as one mother to another, I am here for you. I will pray for you and your family.
Marie, just one more thing… don’t let your thoughts gravitate to the place where you take any blame for this. That is grief’s darkest road, and you will get lost on it. I know you did your best as a mom… and you know it… and Michael knows it too. Don’t punish yourself. That’s a dark tunnel – which doesn’t lead to anything good. Just remember how much you love him. And anyone could see that you do. I don’t mean to give you advice… I just know these few things about suicide, grief and recovery.
God bless you, Marie. And God bless Michael.
Love,
Bobbie Marquis
www.nomoresuicides.com
Myth and Humanity
Adam as a Hussar by Carl Mefferd
Adam loved mythology. When he was about 8 years old, he became extremely curious about myths. At that time, he began to read about Roman mythology… and he later read Greek, Norse, Celtic and Indian. He was drawn to the archetypal stories of heroes, life journeys, stuggle. In school, he was often sidelined at that time. It wasn’t until 4th grade that he began to emerge as a gifted and unique thinker. Before then, he was just viewed as different.
His attraction to the heroic struggles of ancient men never waned. He often painted or drew characters from ancient Rome. He listened to music from the Russian Army Band… large, bold dramatic movements. And whenever a particularly challenging event was in his path, Adam loved to listen to Queen. “We Are the Campions.” It was at these times that he would pace and listen to the driving music, and deeply contemplate and psych himself into the frame of mind of confidence, certainty… clarity of purpose, determination.
I often hear Adam telling me to be braver. I hear him telling me to stand up and to step forward and to believe in myself and in my purpose… these must have been the messages he heard from the gods… his coaches in his life’s short journey.
